It is quite hard to watch a bad film these days. Not because there is a lack of them (far from it), but rather because it has become too easy to pick and choose your way and sort out the dreck after reading reviews, watching trailers and perusing critical ratings. There is a lot to be said for random cinema-going, but since I do not have enough time for that, these are probably the only three flat out bad films I saw in 2024 (which means it is entirely possible that Coppola's Megalopolis in not on this list simply because I chose to avoid it).
Drive-Away Dolls / dir. by Ethan Coen
It is, indeed, very sad that a Coen brother was involved in this. Namely, Ethan Coen, who directed this train-wreck of a road comedy about two lesbians who by sheer accident come to possess some important cargo. The cast is good, and from a certain angle it does have a feel of an oddball Coen brothers film. It is when you look closer that you see that this is just silly fluff that has none of the substance and the density of something like Raising Arizona. Besides, Margaret Qualley keeps doing this preposterous southern accent that comes off as a bad gimmick gone horribly wrong.
The film is bizarrely short (under 90 minutes) but it was a true slog to watch it until the end. There are maybe two jokes in the whole thing that land, everything else feels misguided and pointlessly vulgar.
Hit Man / dir. by Richard Linklater
There were two films about hit men that I watched in 2024. One was called The Killer, starred Michael Fassbender, and was genuinely good. Chilling, powerful, understated. The other was the action comedy Hit Man which I switched off fifteen minutes before the end.
I guess I simply do not get Glen Powell. He seems to be this hot new star who just appears bland to me. In Richard Linklater's latest, he plays a psychology professor turned undercover police officer whose job is to pose as a hit man to save a girl he loves. The premise is not even too bad but God this is such superficial nonsense that I spent one half of the film rolling my eyes and the other half thinking why am I doing this to myself? In the end, after no longer being able to endure the cheesy chemistry between the two main characters, I put myself out of misery. This was contrived and unfunny, and I'm a moderate Linklater fan.
Gladiator II / dir. by Ridley Scott
I was an impressionable teenager when the first part came out, and I loved it to bits. It may have been something more than that, in fact. An obsession. I was obsessed with the music, with Russell Crowe's voice, with Joaquin Phoenix's pettiness. Everything about it hit me where it was supposed to, and over the years I still tried to follow the crazy rumours of a possibly sequel supposedly written by Nick Cave (?), supposedly about Maximus in afterlife.
Having watched the bullshit cash-grab that is Gladiator II, I guess they should have gone for Nick Cave's script. Gladiator II is way more silly and ridiculous than anyone's idea of an afterlife. It is, basically, just a series of admittedly effective fight scenes, laughable plot twists and characters repeating the 'Rome was a dream' phrase that is rendered completely meaningless by the end. Gladiator II is entirely devoid of emotional substance (it is impossible to care for Lucius, and it is not even a knock on Paul Mescal), and it only stirs something inside when the images and the music of the original music make their appearance.
Some people complained about the idea of sharks in the Colosseum. God, if that was the biggest problem...
It was with a very heavy heart that I went to see A Complete Unknown the other day. Two minutes in, though, and I was just happy to be there. I left the cinema with a spring in my step and the sound of about a dozen Dylan's songs playing in my head at the same time.
That's right. I liked the film despite the fact that I'm still not convinced by Timothée Chalamet (I thought that his portrayal of Dylan was somewhat depthless and that he probably overdid that nasal thing), despite the fact that they did not do justice to Suze Rotolo (who was reduced to a Hollywood trope), despite the fact that towards the end of the film they seriously tinkered with history (a work of fiction is just that, though: a work of fiction) and despite the fact that I'm Not There still is the greatest Dylan film ever.
What's important is that I found the whole experience so emotional I could barely hold back my tears during some of the performances (kudos to Chalamet for learning to sing and play all of those songs). I would even watch it all over again, at some point, even if I'm still not sure if that is because the film is great or simply because I love the songs so damn much.
Speaking of which. I used to play this game back in the day: 10 best Dylan songs. There is of course no way you can ever hope to make a list like that without hating yourself or regretting those great choices you had to forego. But still. 10 best Dylan songs. As ever, the golden rule remains the same: not more than one song per album.
Oh and as a bonus: I will attach my favourite lyric / verse from each song. Because, after all, this is Bob Dylan.
10. "Stuck Inside Of Mobile With The Memphis Blues Again" (1966)
Dylan was in such an imperious form in 1965/1966 that almost any song from Highway 61 Revisited or Blonde On Blonde would do. "Stuck Inside Of Mobile" is infectious and intoxicating and could go on for a million more verses for all I care.
Grandpa died last week And now he’s buried in the rocks But everybody still talks about How badly they were shocked But me, I expected it to happen I knew he’d lost control When he built a fire on Main Street And shot it full of holes
9. "Blind Willie McTell" (1983)
That Dylan recorded this during the Infidels sessions and chose not to include it on the actual album is surely one of the biggest mysteries of the man's career. (For the record, Infidels is not as bad as they tell you.) "Blind Willie McTell" is a timeless folk classic that was released a decade later, as part of the third Bootleg Series collection.
Well, I heard that hoot owl singing As they were taking down the tents The stars above the barren trees Were his only audience Them charcoal gypsy maidens Can strut their feathers well And I can tell you one thing Nobody can sing the blues Like Blind Willie McTell
8. "Love Sick" (1997)
Back in 1997, I did not even know that Bob Dylan existed. And yet I can probably imagine what a pleasant shock Time Out Of Mind was for people. After years of treading water, after a string of misguided albums and a couple of LPs covering folk standards, Dylan released a true stone cold classic. "Love Sick" is murky, minimalist and absolutely devastating.
I see lovers in the meadow I see silhouettes in the window I watch them ’til they’re gone and they leave me hanging on To a shadow
7. "Changing Of The Guards" (1978)
I've been addicted to this song for far too long to omit it from this list. The strangely underappreciated Street Legal has other good songs ("Señor", "Is Your Love In Vain") but God do I love this one. Yes, with that booming production, those backing vocalists, that saxophone. The groove is endlessly ecstatic, and the imagery of the lyrics is awe-inspiring.
Gentlemen, he said I don’t need your organization, I’ve shined your shoes I’ve moved your mountains and marked your cards But Eden is burning, either brace yourself for elimination Or else your hearts must have the courage for the changing of the guards
6. "Love Minus Zero / No Limit" (1965)
I would look with suspicion at anyone who doesn't think "Love Minus Zero / No Limit" is one of Dylan's very best ballads.
In the dime stores and bus stations People talk of situations Read books, repeat quotations Draw conclusions on the wall Some speak of the future My love she speaks softly She knows there’s no success like failure And that failure’s no success at all
5. "Tangled Up In Blue" (1975)
Famously, George Harrison was a fan of this one. And who wouldn't be? I personally love Planet Waves, New Morning and even Selfportrait (remember, Dylan was massacred for that one), but it was Blood On The Tracks that restored everyone's faith in Dylan back in the day. Quite simply, "Tangled Up In Blue" is a masterpiece both lyrically and melodically.
I lived with them on Montague Street In a basement down the stairs There was music in the cafés at night And revolution in the air Then he started into dealing with slaves And something inside of him died She had to sell everything she owned And froze up inside
4. "Hurricane" (1975; live version from The Rolling Thunder Revue)
Dylan saw the violinist Scarlet Rivera playing in the street and thought she just had to be in his live band. And what a revelation she turned out to be. This political epic would be an undisputed highlight of next year's Desire, but Rivera absolutely tears it on this live version that can be found on the Live 1975 bootleg (which no person with even a passing interest in Dylan should be without). My head starts spinning when I just think about this performance.
Now all the criminals in their coats and their ties Are free to drink martinis and watch the sun rise While Rubin sits like Buddha in a ten-foot cell An innocent man in a living hell
3. "Don't Think Twice, It's All Right" (1963)
This was very effectively done in the new film. As Dylan is recording the song, a studio engineer asks: "Who wrote this?" Dylan's manager gives the laconic reply: "He did". More than 60 years on, it is still mind-blowing that someone could put their pen to paper and just do it.
Still I wish there was somethin’ you would do or say To try and make me change my mind and stay We never did too much talkin’ anyway So don’t think twice, it’s all right
2. "Ballad Of A Thin Man" (1965)
I used to have a theory that even a Dylan hater would love this song. And I've actually known a couple of people who proved me right. I can't think of another song in which every lyrical line, every bang on the piano makes my spine tingle and brings on a new wave of goosebumps.
You raise up your head And you ask, “Is this where it is?” And somebody points to you and says “It’s his” And you say, “What’s mine?” And somebody else says, “Where what is?” And you say, “Oh my God Am I here all alone?”
1. "She's Your Lover Now" (1966)
And yet I choose this one today, the Blonde On Blonde outtake (partly reminiscent of "One Of Us Must Know") that was first released in 1991. I don't even know why. I just remember that back when I heard it for the first time, I began to laugh uncontrollably. My stomach and my chest were actually contorting with nervous, stifled giggling. It has only happened a few times in my life. Some of James James' short stories did it. "Astronomy Domine" did it. Joaquin Phoenix's acting in The Master did it. Dylan did it with "She's Your Lover Now". I guess this is just my physiological reaction to what is commonly referred to as 'genius'.
P.S. Plus, the abrupt ending is genuinely hilarious.
Yes, you, you just sit around and ask for ashtrays, can’t you reach?..
